Intermission - The Belly of The Beast

I'm on a bus, I left France exactly 4 hours ago. Currently somewhere between Genoa and Milan. My minds wondering, I'm sat on this coach next to a knocked out drunk Italian man, Thankfully I have noice cancelling earphones, Still if I look his way I smell the liquor. I have J Cole playing, Listening to Dollar and a Dream III. What a master piece of an album. I'm sat here thinking about life, I'm thinking about how I'm really going knee's deep into the belly of the beast, My mind image's grappling with dogs, Wondering if it came down to it, who ends who, I have less than £200 in my bank account, I think how far can I get with this, What happens if it runs out, I think about how I'm the only person of colour on this bus, How I could be a single coco pop floating in a bowl of milk, I think about my confidence, or my arrogance, what makes me think I can o this, Why me? Why not! I think about how the stress has got to me in moments, I think about perceptions, I think about how none of that noise matters, I have a mission to do and that comes first, How I make a video shouldn't really matter, If kids can't watch it but it's more authentic then forget it that's better, Kids watch baby shark, I don't want that garbage, because it's curated. I'm not trying to curate anything, it ain't easy out here, This isn't David Attenborough or Bear Grylls, With camera crews, My brother, It's just you out here, On a bus to Montenegro, Forget social media for a moment, Let's talk from the heart, France is done, and I don't feel anything, I didn't feel relief or sadness in leaving, I feel no excitement in where I'm heading, I'm simply doing the job, I have a hint of curiosity for what's ahead, The challenges, but that's just the game, Feelings don't matter, Job's not done. Part 2 Dear Swae, Hah I am used to writing to Swaleh, Today I address your internet persona. Forget all this noise, Hear me, I got you out, I also keep you alive, You do what I tell you, Lock TF in, None of this soft lifestyle, none of this candy and cake's, That create's weakness, weakness will get you killed, Better to be a warrior in a... Type shit. I expect vascularity from you, Not belly roles, look at yourself. Slacking, Weakness propagates weakness which propagates fear. You don't want to be scared get stronger, and this internet persona, You show them a giddy kid because you don't have the substance to hold, so you entertain. Stop. We ain't here as entertainment, Transition. I don't want to be seeing or dealing with a lazy, entertaining, broke version of myself. I'll make the choice for now, Broke Broke is what I can accept, It's the hardest variable to control, Health is not, Strength is not. Let's get to montenegro, 33 hour bus lol, It isn't too bad, just boring. By the time you get of the bus all the vids recorded should be processed, posting depends on internet, Stop doing enough, Start doing more.